An Interview with Doogal* (My Lil' Sis)

As you may recall, my sister made her first (and perhaps last) trip to the Motherland in March.
Tips for my Lil' Sis
We got our beauty on
We ate some chicken



My sister is often quite blunt, so I thought it'd be interesting to hear what she thought about the Motherland. I should warn you that my sister's comments may sound rather judgmental. I disagree with a number of her statements, but I understand where she's coming from.



Her trip to Korea was marred by bad weather, a recent aversion to pork, motion sickness, and my work schedule. My sister's trip was especially affected by a terrible encounter with a woman in the Namdaemun market.



First of all, shopping in an outdoor market on a rainy day is a BAD idea. It was pouring, and my sister's umbrella accidentally dripped a bit of rain water onto a woman's table of merchandise. She promptly pushed my sister and scolded her in Korean. Now, if you've met my sister you know that homie don't play that. Of course, my sister immediately said "Excuse me" and started waving her finger in the air. On top of that, when the ajumma pushed my sister, she fell into another vendor's table. This ajusshi then pushed my sister away from his merchandise. I thought all of this was going to escalate into a brawl, so I quickly ushered my sister away and tried to blame the whole incident on cultural misunderstandings. Of course, shortly after my speech on behalf of these irate vendors, another ajusshi nearly doused me in rain water as I walked by his stall.



I'm continually meeting friendly Koreans, but I have to say that the ajummas and (middle-aged, married folk) can be quite off-putting. I know that given all that they've gone through (war, economic hard times, etc) ajummas and ajusshis feel a sense of entitlement or perhaps a constant need to protect themselves, but is it really necessary to push down a wide-eyed foreigner just to get yourself a seat on the train?

Anyway, check out my interview with Doogal below. (My comments are in purple).

1) What was your first impression of the Motherland?
It was a bit intimidating considering the only time I've seen lights like the one by your house was in Vegas. Korea is very dirty and the people suck (Gross generalization!) But the transportation system is convenient (True.)

2) What were the highlights of your trip?

Shopping and more shopping! Not really the food! I had fun walking around with cyndi for our history tour. Oh yeah and I like taking sticky pics. I've been telling my friend about selca ("Self-camera" photos). Hahaha.

3) What aspects of the Motherland were hard for you to adjust to?
The people and the food.

4) What are your recommendations for first-time visitors to Seoul?
Tourist stuff the first two days and then do all the shopping and eating.

5) Was it hard for you to enjoy Korea given your limited Korean?

Yeah I think a week was perfect the only bad part was that u had to work but I think I did as much as I wanted to do (Dude, you didn't answer the question. I guess I'll answer for you. Yes, it can be challenging to get around if you don't know a little Korean).

6) How did it feel to be in the Motherland?

It wasn't at all what I expected. I don't know. When I saw the commercial on tv, [Korea looked] country (I think she means "rural") but when I got there I didn't really like it. I guess I'm really not as much of a city girl as I thought (Ditto. Forgive us, Motherland. We are simple island girls).

7) What surprised you about the Motherland?

The people and the culture; how dirty everything is since [in the Homeland] Koreans bitch about how dirty stuff is, but hey Korea looks pretty crappy and smells like crap too (That's pretty harsh. Obviously, I did a pretty bad job of showing you around the city. Note to random strangers who read this blog: I will agree that some, ok, many of the streets in Seoul are pretty dirty, but there's much more to the country. Your perspective of the country is limited when you only travel by subway.)

8) Would you ever return to the Motherland?

Yeah I want to but only for the shopping not really interested in anything else.

-----

You can check out the video for some photos from the trip. The photos are a bit sparse, because you forget to take photos when you're immersed in shopping :)

*My sister does not like her alias, so I will hereby refer to my dongsaeng as Doogal (except for the video; It's too much work to change the name in the video). Jeez, neither Cyndi nor Heng were ever this demanding.

Annalog Eats: Cupcakes from Shinsegae

My sister can attest to this: I'm a terrible source of info for visitors to Seoul. In fact, my top three favorite spots in Seoul are simply:
1) Kyobo Bookstore
2) The Food Plaza in the Shinsegae Department Stores
3) Kangnam Undergroud Shopping Center

I realize that given the Motherland's rich culture and history, my list seems pretty lame. I hope to explore more of Korea's historical sites in the forthcoming months, but I'm pretty sure that my top 3 list will remain the same.

Though Korean department stores can be quite nice, I usually avoid them because the crowd of shoppers can be overwhelming and much of the merchandise is overly priced. There are only two reasons for me to stop in the department store 1) To escape the heat 2) To check out the delicacies in the food marketplace.

The food plaza generally features an array of artfully displayed Korean and foreign food items from various vendors. The food is overpriced, but as I've mentioned before, I'd rather splurge on a little cake, then a pair of designer shoes.

I especially like to drool over the beautiful cakes and pastries.

A few weeks ago, Cyndi and I discovered a cupcake vendor in the Myeondong Shinsegae Department Store. The cupcakes are made by One, a company that claims to make "Contemporary American Style cupcakes." (In case this impresses anyone, I should note that One is affiliated with the Chosun Hotel.) I was pretty ecstatic to see cupcakes in Seoul, but at soon as I laid eyes on the colorful cakes, I knew that I was in for a big disappointment. The frosting appeared grainy and the cake appeared dry. Nevertheless, I couldn't stop myself from buying a box (4300 won per cupcake).

Though the cupcakes were sub par, I did appreciate the pretty packaging. For 300 won extra, the cupcakes are wrapped in an adorable little brown box, tied with a pink bow. The alternative is a white box (no charge), which, as the saleswoman pointed out, will likely cause your cupcakes to tumble about and smear the frosting. Um, I guess I'll pay the extra won and preserve the appearance of my expensive little cupcakes?

I really hoped that the cupcakes would be semi-decent, but sadly, they didn't even come close. I'd rather drop 6000 won for some Duncan Hines cake mix in Itaewon than buy a cupcake from One.

If you want to watch me eat an over-priced cupcake or see Piggy before all of her hair was shaved off (I'll explain later), check out the video:

Annalog Eats: Dalk Kalbi

I finally got around to putting together the clips from my sister's visit to the Motherland. My sister's not big on spicy food, so we ended up eating a lot of non-Korean food. While in Kangnam, we tried some dalk galbi (marinated chicken). The chicken was a little too spicy for my sister, but she seemed to enjoy the haemul pa jun (seafood pancakes).

Check out the video for more details.
I'll post more pics from my sister's visit in the next few days.

Fan Mail?

Yeah, I'm as surprised as you are.
Cyndi recently got this email from a fan back home. Admittedly, he's still in elementary school, but obviously he's wise beyond his years, and knows a good blog when he reads one.

---------------

Dear Cyndi,

Please tell...ahem...Annalog,that america didn't get leona lewis cds as soon as she did and that she should try listening to chris brown. he's awesome!how is piggy?He/she is sooooooooooo adorable! XD Oh and tell Annalog to try using a cd player for the love is a song cd.hope u feel better after the hot laser(s) attack...her blog about the lasers was funny but i should'nt be laughing...and i could go on and on about her blog but just one more thing...please ask her if she likes the song bleeding love by leona lewis.

Toodles!

Cutie B

P.S. still laughing about piggy's video and the armpit pain(which i shouldn't be laughing at)and your addiction to those picture taking machines.

----------
Dear Cutie B,

• I read that the Leona Lewis album is flying up the U.S. music charts. I also heard that her U.S. album featured a couple of new songs. I guess I'll have to get a copy of those songs through my dear friend, Mr. Lime Wire. I do like "Bleeding Love." I even tried to sing it at the karaoke, but then, people's ears started to bleed, so I had to stop. My favorite Leona song is "Better in Time."
  
• I don't have a CD player in Korea, so I haven't been able to play the mini CD. :(
  
• We've fully recovered from the laser attacks, but we do have to return next month. (Yikes!) Sometimes it's hard to be a hairy girl. For future reference, if your future wife or girlfriend has hairy armpits, please do not judge her.
  
• Piggy is doing well. She'll see you in September. In the mean time, maybe you could start learning to sew some dog clothes ;)

Thanks for reading my blog. Other than my uncle, I think you just might be my #1 reader. Cyndi & I will be sending you a few Korean trinkets in a few weeks. Hope you're studying hard and having fun!

:) Annalog

Lasers are hot...literally

Our foray into cosmetic procedures continues...

Heng told us about a laser hair clinic in Kangnam that charges 100,00 won (approx $100) for 5 sessions. $100 and I may never have to shave my underarms ever again? I'm in!

After a very superficial search through Google, I learned that under arm hair removal can range from $250-$350 for just ONE treatment.

(Cyndi says that they use a Soprano XL laser)


Today, Cyndi and I went for our first session at Kangnam Won in Seollung (exit 7, Apex Tower, Fourth Floor). Don't be put off by the fact that it's a plastic surgery office. (I'm not judging anyone who's gone under the knife, but I am not at all interested in cosmetic surgery. My cosmetic enhancements stop with braces and "scalings.")

As I mentioned, each under arm treatment is 20,000 won, and you are to pay up front for 5 sessions. Other areas such as legs or arms will cost significantly more.

I knew going in that lasers are hot, but dang, the laser was searing! The entire treatment only took about ten minutes, but it was some of the most painful ten minutes of my life. I always thought that I had a high threshold for pain, so when I looked over at Cyndi's pained expressions, I naively told myself that it wouldn't be as bad.

I am an idiot.

I was yelping like a little girl. It was as if someone was rolling a very hot curling iron against my arm pits. At that moment, I wanted to yell, "Forget it! I'll just move to Europe and stop shaving my under arms. The pain's not worth it."

The physical pain lingers for a few minutes after the procedure, but the memory of your agony will probably haunt you for awhile.

They say that the pain will lessen with each session, but I'm skeptical. They also noted, almost accusingly, that it was more painful for Cyndi and me because our hair follicles were particularly thick. The staffs' repeated assertions that our hair was particularly thick made me feel like they were judging my overly hairy American under arms. I'm sorry, lady. In America, our milk comes with an extra dose of hormones. I can't help it if I'm Harry in comparison to the average Korean woman.

I have no idea if the treatment will actually rid me of all my under arm hair. Frankly, I'm doubtful. My under arms still have a lot of stubble, but I do have four more torture sessions to go. We will go in once a month, so I hope to have baby smooth under arms by the time I head back to the Homeland. I'll report back with an update next month.

Besides the searing pain, my only gripe about the clinic was the service. I hate it when people treat me like an imbecile just because I can't speak Korean very well. My slow response to her instructions probably furthered her low opinion of me. When your armpits are burning, you'll find that your ability to respond properly may slow for a bit.


On the other hand, if I had to remove hair all morning, I'd probably be a little disgruntled as well.


Tips for under arm laser hair removal:
1) Be sure to wear a sleeveless top.
2) Shave the hair before your treatment.
3) If you get the hair removal treatment on any part of your body that may see the sun (i.e., legs or arms) be sure to apply sunscreen daily (even if your limbs are covered).
4) If the lady tells you to flip over, respond promptly or she'll think you're an idiot.

American Mom

축하합니다 to my mom for passing the American Citizenship test!

Meet Piggy

DATE OF BIRTH: January 19, 2008
BIRTHPLACE: Seoul, South Korea
BREED: Part Teen Wolf, part Pot Bellied Pig, part Frog
ACTUAL BREED: Yorkshire Terrier
LIKES: Royal Canin Puppy Food, water, squeaky toys, fingers, and sleep
DISLIKES: vacuum cleaners, baths, soiled newspaper, and falling off the bed






Henney has a new sister, and her name is Piggy!

Assuming that Piggy doesn't grow exponentially within the next five months, Cyndi plans to carry Piggy onto the plane when we head back to California. Fortunately, California doesn't require that dogs be quarantined when entering the state.

Piggy has a tendency to wake up too early for my taste and is not fully potty trained, but other than that, she's proving to be a good roommate. Plus, she looks so cute in a cap!

A word of caution:
Puppies are significantly less expensive in Korea so it is tempting to get a puppy. But, before you purchase a puppy on a whim ala Paris Hilton, research different vendors. Be wary of vendors with dozens of puppies because the dogs likely came from a puppy mill. It's better to purchase a puppy from a small pet shop that only carries a few puppies at a time. Also, this may sound very callous, but if anything is wrong with your puppy, according to Korean law, all vendors (private sellers and pet shops alike) must give you a refund if you contact them with your concerns within 14 days of your purchase.

Sticky Pic Time!

We're kind of obsessed with these sticky pic machines. The Japanese machines are especially cool because they have platforms that widen the posing options. Unfortunately, we can never seem to get the hang of the editing options, whether the instructions are in Korean or Japanese. There are just too many options.

I'm determined to master one of these machines before I head back to the homeland...

Kittyho & Eemobu in Korea

Since arriving in Seoul, I've spent more time and money on my appearance than I've ever spent back in the homeland. Alright, that's a bit of an exaggeration, but it's pretty true. People in Seoul, particularly young women, are extremely conscious of their appearance. Perhaps this is true of women in big cities around the world, but I haven't really experienced such a high degree of image consciousness before.

When living in Seoul, even if your a lazy schlub like myself, you can't help but start to concern yourself with appearance. (Especially when your students say stuff like, "You're pretty, but you have zits." Dang. That comment hurt even more than the big zit on my face.)

Case in point: My sister and uncle were only here for less than a week, but we still dedicated time to get our hair done, get facials, and get some moles removed.

It's so tempting to alter your appearance or undergo some cosmetic procedure while you're in Korea because a) It's generally less expensive. b) You can get excellent service for moderate prices. c) Everyone else does it. Beauty is an essential expenditure. It's neither frivolous nor vain to indulge yourself.

Of course, we had to take my sister & uncle to see Mr. Taek Kim at Lee Chul Hair Kerker in Apgu.

BEFORE
(We were trying to look dour as they do on all those makeover shows.)

Kittyho














Eemo-bu














Cyndi














Annalog















AFTER
(Everyone went short for a fresh new spring look. I am envying their cute cuts, but I've decided to keep my hair long because I'm trying to grow it out for a perm in the summer.)


























































We also took the family to our neighborhood Skin Clinic (dermatologist + facial spa). Cyndi, Kittyho, and Eemo-bu all had a mole or two removed. Mole removal is fairly inexpensive and quick. Depending on the size and roots of your mole, removal ranges from approx. $10-30 a mole. The mole is then extracted with a laser of some sort. The only catch is that you must walk around with a small bandage on your face for 3-4 days.
















I have a few moles on my face, but I decided instead to focus on the zits that my students so kindly pointed out. I elected to go for the "scaling" which involves a light chemical peel and an invasive pimple extraction procedure. The doctor also injects the really gnarly pimples with some mysterious serum.

The procedure did not miraculously eliminate all my blemishes as I had hoped, but it did reduce the size and redness of the pimples.

Even Piggy got in on the makeover action:


BEFORE















AFTER

Note to my Lil' Sis

I am excited that you're coming to visit, but before you do, and knowing you as well as I do, I wanted to give you a heads up on some of the cultural differences that you might find strange and perhaps disconcerting.

1) You will want to wear high heels.
If you are a young woman in Seoul between the age of 20-35 (American age) you must wear high heels. It is not yet an official mandate, but I'm sure that they're working on it. Back home, I often wore slippers or my Converse sneakers because I accept the fact that I'm short. In Korea, on the other hand, I've managed to beat my feet into submission and now wear heels regularly. I know. Say what? Here's the deal. Firstly, it's currently too cold to wear slippers. Secondly, if I wear sneakers people will continue to mistake me for a high school student. In addition to over-sized t-shirts, clunky eyeglasses, and unflattering hair cuts, Converse sneakers seem to be de rigueur for all teens in Seoul. Side note: the contrast between teen girls and young Korean women is quite stark. It's as if immediately after graduation, young tomboyish Korean girls with bad skin and bad hair, magically transform into well groomed swans. They perm their hair. They start pampering their face with "essence" and "BB Cream." They fix their "deviated septums." And, last, but certainly not least, they slip on a pair of heels. The transformations are impressive, yet disturbing.

2) A lady should always carry a little tissue in her purse.
It's always a good idea to carry around a little tissue (unscented) in your purse. Many public restrooms do not contain toilet paper in the stalls. Sometimes there will be a central dispenser near the sinks. In any case, you should always ensure that you have tissue before proceeding with your biznass. Also, most restrooms offer bar soap (if they offer any soap at all). I prefer liquid soap, but I figure bar soap is better than no soap at all.

3) Don't rush the flush.
In what is ostensibly an effort to conserve water resources, public restrooms all have signs that ask patrons to throw used toilet paper in the trash can rather than flushing it down the toilet. I try my hardest to comply with this courtesy rule because I don't want to be the ignorant foreigner who's clogging up the pipes, but... it's really hard! I'm accustomed to flushing the toilet paper down the toilet. Also, the trash cans are overflowing with *blech* used tissues. If I add my tissue, the whole mess will just topple to the floor. Generally, when I encounter an overstuffed trash bin, I'll try to push the trash down and reduce the overflow, BUT I'm not about to do that with a bin of used tissues... in a woman's bathroom...The restroom attendants probably prefer open bins to cans with a lid because they're easier to empty, but honestly, I'd rather take the extra step of opening a lid over sweeping used tissues off the ground.

4) One more thing...
Okay, I know that this is starting to turn into a rant about public restrooms, but here's one more obnoxious observation about El baño. Women are always surreptitiously smoking in (poorly ventilated) bathroom stalls, because it is apparently unseemly for a young woman to smoke in public. Frankly, if you need to hide the fact that you smoke, perhaps you shouldn't be smoking in the first place...

5) Don't let the door hit you on the way in.
Perhaps wistfulness clouds my memory, but I seem to remember that back home, people would usually hold the door open for the person immediately behind them. I'm not talking about gallant gestures. I'm talking about holding the door just long enough so that it doesn't smack the next person in the face. In Korea, I find that this gesture is not so customary. Whether you're young or old, male or female, people go through doors without concern for whoever may or may not be behind them. I've lost track of the number of times that a swinging glass door has nearly plowed me over. I'm trying to resist the system by holding doors open for people, but most people just look at me strangely or ignore me as if I were a part of the door fixture.

6) Public trash cans are rare.
I'm not sure why, but it's hard to find a public trash can in Seoul. Consequently, due to the lack of trash cans, people just throw their trash on the street, creating mini piles of rubbish. At first, I thought the lack of trash cans was to save on garbage disposal labor, but all of these piles of rubbish on the street disappear overnight, so someone is cleaning up the trash anyways. Wouldn't a trash can make it easier?

7) Look all ways before you cross.
Our parents taught us to look both ways before we cross a street. In Korea, you need to look both ways before and while crossing the street. From what I've observed traffic signals seem to be optional. Never assume that a red light means "stop." I've seen enough cars running red lights that I now always cross the street as if I were in a game of Frogger. Unless you want to die at the wheels of a Hyundai, be cautious when crossing a busy intersection.

8) People will shove. Do not shove back.
This one may be hard for you to get used to, but shoving is a natural part of life in a big Asian city. People here have places to be and people to see. It's their prerogative to run down or push past anyone or thing that may be in their way. All the shoving wouldn't be so bad if someone gave an apologetic nod, but I've quickly learned that things are different in this pond. You just gotta keep swimming.


I know that my comments may sound judgmental. This was not my intention at all. I don't mean to disparage the Motherland. In fact, I think it's a remarkable country, and you're sure to have a fabulous time.

I was just thinking back to my first time in the Motherland, and these were the cultural differences that first struck me.

See ya in a few.

- Annalog

Coming Soon to a Blog Near You

Korean Pancakes & an Unexpected Serenade

A few weeks ago, we decided to take a break from our usual shopping/eating routine, and checked out the "Jazz in the City" concert series at the KT Art Hall in Kwanghwamun. Tickets are a deal at only 1000 won. The KT Art Hall seems like a cool place to visit. In addition to musical performances and art, KT features moving making facilities (backdrops, cameras, lights,computers, etc.) that are free to use. If I ever decide to upgrade from my guerrilla snap and shoot style of production, perhaps I'll check out the KT Art Hall equipment.

After the concert, we stopped by a nearby bindae-ddeok restaurant. Bindae-ddeok is another food item that arose out of harder times, when grains were just way too expensive. It's a Korean pancake made out of mung bean powder, and often mixed with savory meats or seafood. We stopped at a restaurant that claims to be the 원조 or the "original" bindae-ddeok restaurant.

Now, this is the part where I get all Seinfieldian and have to ask, "What's the deal with the use of the word 'original'?" First of all, how can one possibly claim to be "THE Original." How do we know that some cave woman didn't mix together some crushed mung bean, chopped woolly mammoth, and water, and fry it up in her little prehistoric skillet? In my opinion, the title of "original" may only be claimed by the first person or persons to publicize their achievement. So for all you future inventors and visionaries out there, I suggest that once you've created something worthy of merit, at the very least post a notice on your facebook profile or your myspace blog. That way, twenty years from now, when everyone's claiming to have been the "original" creator of the deep fried chocolate cheeseburger craze, you can always refer to your good old blog.

Even if one's claims of being the "original ____________" is valid, in terms of the consumer, this really has little value. I think we're all guilty of confusing the word "original" with the word "best." Just because someone was the first to do something, this doesn't guarantee that they were or are the best. The Wright brothers may have been the original inventors of the airplane, but if given a choice between their rickety prototype and a 747, what would you choose?

In Korea, we're always seeing food stands that claim to be the "original" amongst dozens of other vendors who sell the same exact product. I respect the originator of a food trend, but frankly, I imagine that the following captions would be more eye-catching: AWARD WINNING (I mean, you don't have to specify which award), LOWEST PRICES (10 cents cheaper will do), or DANIEL HENNEY EATS HERE.

I'm not certain if the restaurant we went to was the original of originals, but it certainly looked over fifty years old. Their bindaeddeok was tasty, but also very greasy. The experience was particularly memorable thanks to the impromptu serenade by some random ajusshi. He literally just walked into the restaurant and started playing his guitar. His serenade reminded me of the troubadour on Gilmore Girls, except our guy was a little greasier, and probably more drunk.

CD Freebie

I recently bought Leona Lewis' album Spirit, and received a nice little freebie, a mini cd featuring songs from Chris Brown, Alicia Keys, and Mario. I don't recall ever getting any freebies back home. Perhaps freebies are the solution to stopping illegal downloading.

Yeah, you're right. It's not.
















Unfortunately, I can't play the mini CD because I have a MacBook. I guess the mini CD is Sony BMG's way of telling me that I need to buy a Sony VAIO.

The album also came with a Korean translation of all the lyrics.















I'm enjoying Lewis' album, lots of catchy RnB songs with a pop flare. I'd give it a B+.

Teacher Annalog: V is for Victory

It's admittedly a small victory, but I'm going to shamelessly revel in it nevertheless.

To my astonishment, my fourth grade demons have started to refer to me as "Miss Annalog." I only asked them to call me "Annalog." The "Miss" part is a pleasant surprise. They've referred to me as "Miss Annalog" for the past two classes, so I no longer think it's a fluke occurrence.

Some of you must be wondering, how did you tame those wild beasts? My answer is probably contrary to everything you'd probably learn as a professionally trained teacher, but here are a few of my tips:

1. When students call you a "devil" or tell you, in so many words, that they despise your existence, simply respond, "I'm rubber and you're glue. Whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you."

2. Then, reinforce their low opinion of you through self-deprecating humor.
Or, do a reverse attack, and indulge in self-flattery and ask things like, "Besides me, of course, who do you admire most in the world?" I like to mix up both tactics in an effort to confuse them and leave them thinking, "Does she want us to hate her or love her?"

3. Reward students with candy. I believe that in the biz, they call this "bribery."

4. If you are dealing with primarily male elementary students, try to drop the following words as much as possible: butt, blood, bombs, fart, Nintendo DS, and monsters. If you are dealing with female students, I imagine that you should use these terms: pink, princess, puppies, cell phones, and Hanna Montana.

5. Encourage every little action worthy of merit.
You did all of your homework? Excellent? You did MOST of your homework? Nice job! You only did the easy parts of your homework? Good effort! You threw you cup in the GARBAGE CAN? That's so thoughtful of you! You didn't try to disparage my reputation as a teacher? You're a champ! You don't wish me to die -- TODAY? You are just too precious!

6. Allow students to take an extra long break.
Okay, that one's really not to win the boys over. That's really more for your sanity.

7. If all else fails, threaten to call their mom.

I think that about covers it.
I hope my advice will help teachers across the globe.
I should note that I am not responsible for any ill consequences that may arise from practice of these tips. Your misuse of the aforementioned strategies simply means that you are inept and obviously not as skilled as Teacher Annalog. :)

Bandit & the Snowball

Bandito is now available for performances in the greater Seattle area.


Random note: I was trying to switch over and share my videos with Vimeo because it has something to do with HD and its interface and design are visually pleasing. But, to my horror, it was going to take 340 minutes to load my little "Bandit" video because Vimeo was very "busy." What's the deal, Vimeo? This is why I'm now back to Jumpcut.

Shout out to my sister

Happy Birthday Stacy! from Annalog on Vimeo

We brought back the hats just for you.
We're brining sexy back. Yuh. Yuh.

Good Eats: Ddeok Sam

I know that I sort of swore off celebrity-owned restaurants, but this one's in my neighborhood. Plus, I didn't even know that he was a celebrity until Cyndi told me.















I still don't know this actor's name, but he's apparently appeared in a lot of sageuk, historical dramas. I don't know how he is as an actor, but he's definitely a great restaurateur. He's very attentive. He even goes around to all of the tables to replenish your garlic or lettuce supply.

There are many samgyupsal restaurants in Bundang, but I particularly enjoy Ddeok Ssam because service is great, portions are fairly generous, and you can wrap the samgyupsal in thinly sliced ddeok, Korean rice cakes.

Kang Ho Dong needs to take note.

You know the deal. Take a look at the video for more detail.

TAEIN oppa: Don't you think the actor kind of looks like your dad?

Ddeok Ssam from Annalog on Vimeo

Speaking of celebrities, I spotted an adorable actress at the Coex Mall today.
엄마: It was the little girl from your favorite movie:


















We wanted to take a photo with her because she's so cute, but we felt a little awkward. She was in the toy store just trying to be a regular kid. Instead, we just openly gawked at her. That's less awkward, right?

Teacher Annalog: "How to be an Awesome President"

I recently started teaching a small class of fourth grade international school students. Because they are nine-year-old boys from privileged backgrounds, they can be quite antagonistic. As they remind me on a regular basis, they hate me and think that I am a devil because (a) I am a "girl" (b) assign them homework (c) make them take a vocabulary quiz and (d) make them write an essay every week. For some reason, they are under the impression that I am their babysitter or royal entertainer, and not their highly esteemed reading and writing teacher. These boys better recognize.

I'm determined to win them over through patience, candy, vocab games, and a generous tolerance for references to violence and video games.

Today, they started referring to me as "Ms. Devil." I see this as a step in the right direction. In fact, one student even gave me a piece of bubble gum. It was wrapped, so I don't have to worry about the gum being poisoned. Plus, I let the other boys eat the gum in class for safe measure.

Even though they can be quite horrid, I'm starting to enjoy the class. I especially enjoy reading their essays. My elementary students may not be strong writers, but they often prove to be quite insightful, despite their limited writing skills. Meanwhile, the essays of my older students are poorly written AND lack creativity or critical thinking.

Since the Homeland is in the midst of an election year, I thought I'd share a couple of essays courtesy of my fourth grade demons. The topic was: "What are the necessary qualities for a good president?"

Obama and McCain need to take note.

Editorial comments are in italics.

----

President !!!
Written by: Too Smart for his Own Good

Presidents are really serious when they are talking what about to do for the future. They also need to be clean and look good. They also need to have the responsibility to speech.

They need to be clean when there doing there speech. But they could be clean or dirty in there home. The reason is that the people won't like to see a dirty president doing speech.

They also need to have the responsibility to speech. The reason is that they should make there own speech because they can't just stay there saying nothing. They also need to have a responsibility because they can't just say something wrong then the people will be thinking they are crazy.

These are my reasons why presidents have to be serious and be careful when they give a speech.

Teacher Annalog: Seriously, future Mr. President. Just be sure to look good and prevent yourself from saying anything foolish. I guess our current president would argue that it's easier said than done...

---

President
Written by: The Nice One

If you want to be a president, you need to make laws for the country. Laws are very helpful, because people will be safe, and country will not ruin.

Second, you need to be responsible so everybody can believe you, and you can hear good things about you or some people can peak you for president again.

Third, you need to be smart, because if you foolish, everybody have a much complains to president, and your country will ruins, or your country will be going poor, and you may be impeached.

Last, you need to be kind to everyone so that everyone will love their president, and support the presidents party. If you want to be president, I think you need these qualities.

Teacher Annalog: As most presidents will attest to, the presidency is not about leading the country per se. The presidency is about your LEGACY. What will the history books say? Are you going to go down as the chump that "ruined" the country or will you be remembered as the charismatic president that everyone loved (and narrowly escaped impeachment). Also, don't forget about your party. They MADE you. You better represent or else... you just might wake up one day and find the severed head of Ann Coulter in your bed.

A "Love Song" from Annalog & Cyndi

In Korea, it is customary for the girl to give out chocolates to her special someone on Valentine's Day, while guys are expected to reciprocate on "White Day" on March 14th. If you don't get any love on Valentine's Day or White Day, then you're suppose to commiserate with your other single, loser friends over a bowl of black bean noodles on "Black Day" (April 14).

Looks like Cyndi and I will be eating some jajjang myun in April, because we are surrounded by a bunch of ajusshis and married people. We're definitely not giving out any chocolates this year.

Instead of chocolates, I've decided to send all my family & friends (and I guess a couple of random strangers) a little virtual video valentine.

Yes, it is another one of my zany music videos.

Now, before my mom can say, "this is why you two are single," I should note that I coerced Cyndi into participating in the video. She is normally not so yupki. She is a lovely, sane-minded young woman, who is normally above such foolishness and absurdity. It's just that she's a good sport, and I can be very intimidating. :)

If you were impressed by Cyndi's performance, and you are a charismatic young bachelor, 180 cm tall, at least 28 years old, employed, likes dogs, and possess a good sense of humor, then you should holla at Cyndi in the comments.

Hope you have a good Valentine's!

Queens Park Bakery

There is a plethora of bakeries in Seoul, but I find that most of them offer similar fare -- pastries and buns in a Frenchish vein.

Weaned on American delicacies such as box mix cakes, brownies, and Nestle Tollhouse cookies, I've become quite particular in my palette for sweets.

Until I recently got all the fixings to make my own brownies and cookies, I often stopped into bakeries looking for a brownie or chocolate chip cookie. Though not common, I've managed to find a number of brownies and chocolate chip cookies, but they've all turned out to be bland, dry, and definitely overpriced. Let's not skimp on the butter, people!

The only bakery that has come close to making a decent brownie is Queens Park in Apkujung. The selection of pies, cakes, loaves, and pastries all look very lovely, but I have to warn you, they're quite pricey. But, if you're like me, and willing to spend more on baked goods than you do on shoes or clothing, then perhaps Queens Park won't seem like such a bad deal.

In addition to baked goods, Queens Park offers a nice looking brunch and dinner menu. I've only sampled the baked goods, but I imagine that the sit down menu is pretty nice.

Good Eats: Roti Bun Challenge

While folks back home are just starting to ooh and aah over the Red Mango fro-yo trend, Koreans have already moved on to the next hot food item: roti buns.

Based on my source (i.e., google), the roti bun trend originated from Malaysia. The roti bun is a soft, butter-filled bread, topped with a sugary coffee-flavored crust. I also read that this bun is based on a Mexican recipe. So basically, roti bun is a Malaysian concoction based on a Mexican recipe, now sold in Korea. You got that?

A few months ago, two roti bun shops opened up in my neighborhood: Roti Boy and Papa Roti. They opened for business on the SAME DAY, and virtually just around the corner from each other. I'm no business major, but I suspect that such close competition does not make for good business.

Cyndi and I decided to do a little product comparison and give our expert opinions on which roti bun shop will prevail; a roti bun rumble, if you will.

Frankly, I don't think either shop will be around in a year's time because that's the way Korean businesses seem to roll.

I should note that I'm a little partial to Roti Boy, because they gave me a stamp card. (Arg, they trapped me with their stamp card!).

Good Eats: Kang Ho Dong's Samgyupsal

We really should stop eating at establishments simply because they're owned by some Korean celebrity. After getting our hair done at Leechul Hairkerker in Apgujeong, we decided to try out the restaurant owned by Kang Ho Dong, a mega popular TV personality.

Kang Ho Dong's 678 Samgyupsal was a major disappointment. The meat was overly thick and rough. I nearly broke a tooth while trying to chew the pork cartilage. The banchan was sucksville. The service was also lacking. I felt very neglected. Kang Ho Dong, we want our money back, or at least some free tickets to Yashimanman.

Anyway, check out the video for more detail.

Speaking of which, I think I need to stop with the videos. I seem to be losing all sense. My threshold for embarrassment seems to be on the rise. These videos have become some sort of shameless vice. I know I must stop, but I just can't seem to help myself...

More about Eyelash Extensions

I've gotten some inquiries about my fabulashes both online and offline, so I think it's time for me to blog a little more about the fabulous Ms. Summer, the 언니 responsible for my lash extensions.

Summer was previously working out of a salon who's name I will no longer mention. Unfortunately, the salon owner is a petty biatch so Summer has decided to take her business elsewhere. She's just not sure where. I'll let you know when she's found a regular work space. In the mean time, Summer's been trekking it to Bundang to maintain our lashes. Thanks, Summer! You are 최고!

By the way, fellas, Summer is single. Holla in the comments if you are a tall, employed, bachelor, with a good heart.















Here's Heng modeling Summer's handiwork.














I can't rave enough about these lash extensions. The application of the individual lash pieces can be quite time consuming (Summer is still a relative newbie at this, but the process can take about 1-1.5 hours). However, in my humble opinion, the ordeal is quite worth it. I recently looked at some old photos of myself, and realized that my fabulashes make a subtle, yet significant difference.

A number of people have asked Cyndi and me if our lashes our natural, and though we are tempted to say, yes, of course they are; I am greatly offended by your question, we end up telling them the truth: "We just use some really good mascara."

;)

Maybe it's real, or maybe it's synthetic lashes painstakingly glued to my lash line.

I'm not sure about the consequences on my natural lashes, but I suppose I'll find out once I head back to California... As far as I can tell, my natural lashes haven't fallen out more than usual.

In addition to lash extensions, Summer is a skilled nail artist. Check out her skillz below.















Cyndi kindly captured a brief clip of Summer in action (as well as the big zit on my chin). I shamelessly sleep through most of the procedure, so overall it's quite an enjoyable experience for me; I wake up well-rested with voluminous lashes.

Magazine Freebies

One of the things that I love about Korea's highly consumerist society is the prevalence of freebies! Give it up for free stuff!

You walk into any cosmetics chain and you're sure to walk out with at least some free cotton swabs or some face mask sample. It's like a frugal girl's version of Halloween. Me loves it.

If you decide to buy a Korean fashion magazine, be sure to get an issue that comes with some sort of free gift. Do not settle for less. It is your right as a consumer in Korea, a right called "service."

In America, all you ever get are some annoying subscription postcards that threaten to fall out every time you open the magazine. At most, you get some tiny sample of makeup concealer that is unlikely to match your skin tone. You certainly never get anything that you could re-gift...

Korean magazines are far superior in terms of freebies. I should note that the complimentary gifts may be seem a little random, but one should never look a (free) gift horse in the mouth. (Did I get the expression right? I think I'm beginning to lose my ability to speak Engrish).


Pick up an issue of CeCe and get a tube of Pringles (Pringles Light, of course. You are a woman after all).














Ran out of grapeseed oil? No problem. Just run to Kyobo Bookstore and pick up a couple of bottles.














(Thanks for the corrections HY) An issue of Cindy the Perky magazine will get you a scale and some sort of useless face shaping device.














It's a little disconcerting that all of these freebies reinforce the body consciousness inspired by the photo-shopped models in the fashion magazines, but then again... it's FREE!

Good Eats: Chinese Noodles in Chungmuro

If you're looking for a puppy, Chungmuro is the place to go. Take subway Line #3 to Chungmuro, take exit 3, and you'll find a line of puppy mills, I mean, puppy shops, including the store were Paris Hilton picked up a Pomeranian.

While in Chungmuro, we stopped for some old school Chinese noodles.

Good Eats: French Food in Jeongja (video)

Free at last. Free at last...sort of. The Winter Intensives session is not completely over, but I now have time to dwell on more important matters like posting photos of food, making music videos, and speculating over Heath Ledger's death (R.I.P).

In celebration of my newly regained freedom, Cyndi, Patrick, and I went to check out the fancy schmancy restaurants in Jeongja-dong. Jeongja is a particularly affluent neighborhood in Bundang, and is the place to go for over-priced, yet satisfactory foreign food. This area of Jeongja, which I will hereby refer to as "Restaurant Row," strangely reminds me of Disneyland. It's like stepping into another country.

We decided to check out a French restaurant called "Aix en provence." I was a little apprehensive going in, because Aix en provence vaguely reminded me of Minto. Fortunately, it was levels above Minto (though, that's not saying much). I'm not familiar with French cuisine, but the menu didn't seem very French. I didn't even see any French Onion Soup or ratatouille.

The salad was sloppy and the steak was covered in an overly sweet sauce, but the food overall was tasty, if not authentically French. (I should note that the steak was decent, but not as good as Patrick made it out to be. Patrick is a good actor).

I captured our dinner on video, and am posting the footage for your viewing pleasure.

I think that I'll try to make these Good Eats Videos a regular Annalog feature, but that all depends on my schedule and level of laziness.

Teacher Annalog: Write a Scary Story

Most Korean students are currently off from school. In America, most families would consider this a vacation period. Unfortunately, in Korea, winter break simply means more hours spent in hagwons, academies specializing in SAT prep, math, science, English, etc.

I normally teach junior high and high school students, but this month, I have the opportunity to teach an intensive reading and writing course for elementary school students (fifth and sixth graders). They may not be fluent in English, but they make up for their lack of proficiency with their exuberance and attentiveness. They can be quite a handful, but they never cease to amuse me.

I won't have much time for leisurely posts for the next two months, but I thought I'd ocassionally post a sample of their writing, because kids truly do say the darnedest things.

Their writing may not always be grammatically correct, or for that matter, coherent, but is often surprisingly insightful.

_____________________________________________________
Topic: Tell me a scary story or describe a scary incident that happened to you. Include an example of simile or personification.

"The Mummy"*
I'm afraid of my mummy because when her get angry she always control me to clean my room. If I clean quickly she tell me again to clean the bathroom. Sometimes she yell and hit me so I afraid of my mother and my father afraid her too. When my mother was sick, but my father don't care her so she is going angry and she ran out of my home.

Teacher Annalog's comments: Take note, student. It's best that you learn this lesson at a young age. You should never upset Mother, especially when she feels like crud.


"It's a Hard Knock Life"
When I was in second grade I was playing at the friend's house. We was playing gameboy. I didn't know the time was 11 p.m. because I was so concentrated playing gameboy. So outside was as dark as dark chocolate. I was walking away home and I was resting at slide in playground. 10 minutes later 3 mens were coming me. The mans were big as hulk and tall as giraffe. They came to me and said "give me money" so I ran fast as cheeta and yelled big as I could. The trees were whispering to me "run faster." At the place were the place divides in to 2 ways I got to get free by them chasing me. I told to my parents that there is gangster here. that was my bad day in my life.

Teacher Annalog's comments: You are strong and agile like a Denzel Washington. May the winds continue to guide you with their whispered wisdom.


"Like Scary Man"
I'm afraid about dog because of really dangerous accident. When I was nine years old, I get a big hurt from dog. I want to forget that accident. Let me tell you detail.
I was buying a good for grandmother and the dog was coming to me. So I ran away from him. Dog sounds like very scary man. This is the reason why I afraid about dog.

Teacher Annalog's comments: This totally happened to me, except I was with my grandmother... and we were trying to steal mangoes from my neighbor's yard... and the dog was scary like Britney, post K-Fed.


"The Bat"
I am afraid of my mom. Especially when I late from the promise. She is very scary. Once time I played with my friends and I came really late to home because of playing. The home was silent when I got into home. It was like a desert with no one but myself. And I wanted to just cover this up so I slowly went into my room suddenly the silent word of mom made me scary. I wanted to escape from my mom as fast as I can. But my mom came with an aluminum bat. That day was a very hurted day with a bat.

Teacher Annalog's comments: Do not be disheartened. Many a brave man has been defeated by the "silent word of mom." Even the most formidable soldier could not help but acquiesce to the wordless gaze of an angry mother... or an aluminum bat.

*I took the liberty of creating titles for each of the featured pieces.

Winter Fashion Extravaganza

Having grown up in a tropical climate, I've always yearned for the opportunity to wear winter apparel. (I always thought that earmuffs were an accessory. I never realized that they were a necessity!)

Unfortunately, the saying is true; be careful what you wish for. I'm still struggling to adjust to the biting cold, but I certainly appreciate the opportunity to buy more winter coats! (The coat that I brought from California barely even sufficed for autumn in Korea).

I'm a bit embarrassed to admit how many coats I've purchased within the last month. The assortment of coats can be quite overwhelming. All but one of the coats that I purchased in Korea cost less than $100 (Can you guess which one was more than $100?).

TIP: All winter coats go on sale in early January, so this is the best time to shop for trendy winter gear.

These trendy coats may not be the best long term investment, but they certainly enable a nice variety in your winter wardrobe.

(Oh, man. I can only imagine what it's going to cost to mail all of these coats home).

Cyndi and I decided to ANTM it up, and share some of our new coats with y'all. Check out the photos below.

STACY: The first two coats are actually for you. Let me know if you want any additional coats.

The Librarian


















Sexy Ninja (Military Style)


















The 어머나


















Sporty Devil Zip-Up


















Short Skirt, Long, Cap-Sleeved Jacket


















Checkered Cutie


















In the Navy


















Church Coat


















Waldo's Coat


















The Coat that's in Dire Need of Dry Cleaning


















The Spottie Dottie (Stacy: The bunny hat is also for you. Man, I am one thoughtful sister!)



















The Blue Bath Robe with Flair


















The "Does this Make Me Look Japanese?" Coat

The Subway Nightmare Before Christmas

I refuse to spend New Year's Eve in Seoul. I spent Christmas in Seoul, and it was way too crowded. Check out the video at the end of the post to see what I mean. Also, I'm tired. I spent most of my day (and evening) teaching. I know, poor me.

I can't believe it's already the new year. I didn't even get a chance to tell you about our Christmas festivities!

Since Tim and Daniel Henney were busy, Cyndi and I spent Christmas day with the lovely Ms. Bo. We buffeted it up Itaewon at a place called Toque Diner. Toque featured a nice Christmas "brunch," which included mashed potatoes and turkey. It wasn't as awesome as deep fried turkey, but the spread satisfied my turkey craving.



























































I'm starting to feel like all holidays in Korea are whittled down to be some variation of Valentine's Day. Back home, Christmas was about spending the holidays with all your loved ones. From what I've observed, Christmas in Seoul is not so much about family, as it is about romancing your significant other.

Thanks a lot, Motherland, for making single twenty-somethings feel like losers on Christmas Day :)

After our filling turkey brunch, we headed over to City Hall, which is apparently the place to be on Christmas. Unfortunately, thousands upon thousands of folks had the same idea.

I'm not claustrophobic, but I was a bit frightened when we started to make our way through the subway station. You'll just have to watch the following video to witness the chaos for yourself. As a born-and-raised American, the word "lawsuit" kept running through my head as I tried to prevent myself from being trampled by old ladies and giddy sixteen-year-olds.